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Advice please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
Foruminnehåll / Life in general
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Skriv svar | Skapa ny tråd
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-24 20:59:07
Beautiful-Lies
hey guys as you already know im in love with my ex and he says hes in love with me but he doesnt wanna hurt me....hes sexually active and im not and he cant go a month without having sex...i love him...and i wanna be with him but hes scared hes gonna cheat on me...then he says i can do it for u baby...meanin he will not have sex with another gurl if he breaks up with his gf and goes otu with me...he said he has "lotion and playboys" to get him through...i really lvoe him and wanna be with him...what should i do??
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-24 21:09:17
Jojoboo
Give him a chance, if you find out he's cheating on you, dump him.

I still think it's bad of him to be like that when he already has a gf though.

How old is he?
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-24 21:13:42
Beautiful-Lies
hes 15...hes a foster kid...he doesnt know his parents....
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-24 21:38:24
Experiment-626
since you said he's sexually active.. he should be undergo an HIV checkup. This sounds harsh but you should take care of yourself.
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-24 21:43:11
Beautiful-Lies
i know..but im not even with him right now...i wanna be so bad...
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-24 22:17:53
Sensei
xpress2myheart skrev:
i know..but im not even with him right now...i wanna be so bad...


All the more reason to protect yourself. I think you are caught up in infatuation and even a little lust. My advice is to chill out- take a break from him, thinking about him, talking about him, obessing over him( and anyone else for that matter )and do somethings you really like-for yourself.

You have plenty of time for the romance thing down the road....
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-24 22:50:57
Experiment-626
yes ashley.. take the advice from sensei.. he gives the BEST advice :) no doubt about it !!
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 02:50:34
-blondie-
i went through the exact same thing...but in the end, he ended up breaking up with me. it sucked because i got my heart broken again, but i wasn't ready for sex...i mean, look at the consequences [STD's, aids, pregnancy, etc.] ask him...do you want this? and if he says no...tell him that he isn't ready to do this and that he needs to chill out. sex isn't the answer to every problem...and he is being manipulative...he is trying to get you to have sex with him...if i were you, i would tell him that i didn't want to be associated with someone like that. it's going to hurt...but i don't think that it would hurt as bad as him breaking your heart again or you giving in to having sex and you end up feeling horrible about doing it or ending up pregnant or anything...he should understand what you are trying to tell him...and if he doesn't, he is not the right guy for you.
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 04:25:06
Cygnus
Citat:
he cant go a month without having sex


B.S. There are people who have gone through a lifetime without sex for some cause of their's. It's not impossible. Are you sure he means "can't go a month without sex," or does he mean "you're not important enough to me to go for a month without sex"? Looks like it's the second one, because with the right amount of will power, ANYONE can go a month without sex.

Where does a person get the will power? From seeing something more valuable than sex that they'd have to give up sex for. Then, they give it up, for that higher value. Obviously, if he broke up with you because you weren't giving him any, he doesn't value you more than he values sex. As in, on his list of priorities, you are below sex. That's just pathetic. He has no right to tell you he loves you if this is the case.

He has a total lack of priority. Why would you want someone like that?
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 05:12:16
retroxchique
aww...
ashlee, because i care, I really hope you don't have sex with him right now. If you love him so much, maybe you guys can talk about it, you know. I mean rushing things aren't going to make it better by very much.
And since we're so young, and we don't wait, that ruins a lot of things. Ash, is he the ONE? I mean there are so many guys.

But maybe you can call him and talk, you can't prove true love by having sex. And I don't think just because he doesn't get it, doesn't mean he can't live. If he respects you he'll wait, if he doesn't, I would start looking somewhere else, dear.

Luff ya. Lucy
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 06:30:46
Experiment-626
wow the above 3 person says it all :) good words, ladies :)
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 10:39:58
BibFortuna
I'm guessing this is the same person as the one on that freaky messenger conversation on the other topic. I already told you he seems like a complete idiot to me AND in the meantime he is cheating on his current gf, but let me guess, you think that's all perfectly normal because he is in love with *you* and as long as *you* aren't the one that's being hurt, it's all ok right? .

Gah, I'm already looking out to the topic where you will be here crying and sobbing because he got bored with you and has done a likely thing to you like he's done to his gf now.


NOT!!! ;p
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 13:42:14
Beautiful-Lies
thevinylqueen skrev:
aww...
ashlee, because i care, I really hope you don't have sex with him right now. If you love him so much, maybe you guys can talk about it, you know. I mean rushing things aren't going to make it better by very much.
And since we're so young, and we don't wait, that ruins a lot of things. Ash, is he the ONE? I mean there are so many guys.

But maybe you can call him and talk, you can't prove true love by having sex. And I don't think just because he doesn't get it, doesn't mean he can't live. If he respects you he'll wait, if he doesn't, I would start looking somewhere else, dear.

Luff ya. Lucy


we talk alll the time...and we never ever talk about sex...he doesnt want me to do anything i dont wanna do...hes told me that...cuz he smokes and drinks and stuff and never asked em to do any of that either.....but i rilly dont think its lust cuz when hje broke up with me the first time cuz we live on opposite sides of tow(20 minutes away maybe),i couldnt stop thinkin bout him and every dude i datedi compared to him...and everywhere i went i seen his name or heard it...its crazy...i get butterflys when i talk tohim...and then dont knwo what to say or what to do...
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 14:04:19
Jojoboo
xpress2myheart skrev:
thevinylqueen skrev:
aww...
ashlee, because i care, I really hope you don't have sex with him right now. If you love him so much, maybe you guys can talk about it, you know. I mean rushing things aren't going to make it better by very much.
And since we're so young, and we don't wait, that ruins a lot of things. Ash, is he the ONE? I mean there are so many guys.

But maybe you can call him and talk, you can't prove true love by having sex. And I don't think just because he doesn't get it, doesn't mean he can't live. If he respects you he'll wait, if he doesn't, I would start looking somewhere else, dear.

Luff ya. Lucy


we talk alll the time...and we never ever talk about sex...he doesnt want me to do anything i dont wanna do...hes told me that...cuz he smokes and drinks and stuff and never asked em to do any of that either.....but i rilly dont think its lust cuz when hje broke up with me the first time cuz we live on opposite sides of tow(20 minutes away maybe),i couldnt stop thinkin bout him and every dude i datedi compared to him...and everywhere i went i seen his name or heard it...its crazy...i get butterflys when i talk tohim...and then dont knwo what to say or what to do...


He broke up on you because you live 20 minutes away from each other?!

Shit, I've had a boyfriend 30 miles away and the reason we broke up had nothing to do with the distance.
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 15:08:18
Beautiful-Lies
Jojoboo skrev:
xpress2myheart skrev:
thevinylqueen skrev:
aww...
ashlee, because i care, I really hope you don't have sex with him right now. If you love him so much, maybe you guys can talk about it, you know. I mean rushing things aren't going to make it better by very much.
And since we're so young, and we don't wait, that ruins a lot of things. Ash, is he the ONE? I mean there are so many guys.

But maybe you can call him and talk, you can't prove true love by having sex. And I don't think just because he doesn't get it, doesn't mean he can't live. If he respects you he'll wait, if he doesn't, I would start looking somewhere else, dear.

Luff ya. Lucy


we talk alll the time...and we never ever talk about sex...he doesnt want me to do anything i dont wanna do...hes told me that...cuz he smokes and drinks and stuff and never asked em to do any of that either.....but i rilly dont think its lust cuz when hje broke up with me the first time cuz we live on opposite sides of tow(20 minutes away maybe),i couldnt stop thinkin bout him and every dude i datedi compared to him...and everywhere i went i seen his name or heard it...its crazy...i get butterflys when i talk tohim...and then dont knwo what to say or what to do...


He broke up on you because you live 20 minutes away from each other?!

Shit, I've had a boyfriend 30 miles away and the reason we broke up had nothing to do with the distance.



that was only one of the reasons...he always was getting in trouble...like grounded so we couldnt hang out or talk...and we werent in the same school at the time and now we are
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 15:09:20
Jojoboo
And why were he getting into trouble, eh?

I'd watch out.
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 15:29:37
Experiment-626
according to ashlee.. this person drinks alcohol, smoke drugs, been having sex with different girls, and other stuff..

thats why he's always grounded.

so ashlee.. is it or will it be worth it to go out with a NO-GOOD defective guy ? considering he's an outlaw ?

he might be handsome to you.. but theres more to love than just physical look.. most people looks at personality first.

He should be at some youth correction facility.. if not, its like having a wild dog randomly roaming around your town.. waiting to randomly bite random people
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 15:43:44
Beautiful-Lies
Experiment-626 skrev:
according to ashlee.. this person drinks alcohol, smoke drugs, been having sex with different girls, and other stuff..

thats why he's always grounded.

so ashlee.. is it or will it be worth it to go out with a NO-GOOD defective guy ? considering he's an outlaw ?

he might be handsome to you.. but theres more to love than just physical look.. most people looks at personality first.

He should be at some youth correction facility.. if not, its like having a wild dog randomly roaming around your town.. waiting to randomly bite random people


Yeah, but hes had a hard life....hes a foster child and he gets moved from house to house...and i dont love him for the way he looks...thats deffinatly not it...he makes me happy with who i am...he makes me laugh...hes sweet...and its just the kindess in his voice....he holds my hand....lets me cry on his shoulders...gives me hugs...his kisses are so sweet and not forceful or controlling...
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 15:47:28
Jojoboo
xpress2myheart skrev:
Experiment-626 skrev:
according to ashlee.. this person drinks alcohol, smoke drugs, been having sex with different girls, and other stuff..

thats why he's always grounded.

so ashlee.. is it or will it be worth it to go out with a NO-GOOD defective guy ? considering he's an outlaw ?

he might be handsome to you.. but theres more to love than just physical look.. most people looks at personality first.

He should be at some youth correction facility.. if not, its like having a wild dog randomly roaming around your town.. waiting to randomly bite random people


Yeah, but hes had a hard life....hes a foster child and he gets moved from house to house...and i dont love him for the way he looks...thats deffinatly not it...he makes me happy with who i am...he makes me laugh...hes sweet...and its just the kindess in his voice....he holds my hand....lets me cry on his shoulders...gives me hugs...his kisses are so sweet and not forceful or controlling...


So, being a foster child excuses the fact that he sleeps around, drinks, parties, drugs or whatever?
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 15:50:53
Beautiful-Lies
Jojoboo skrev:
xpress2myheart skrev:
Experiment-626 skrev:
according to ashlee.. this person drinks alcohol, smoke drugs, been having sex with different girls, and other stuff..

thats why he's always grounded.

so ashlee.. is it or will it be worth it to go out with a NO-GOOD defective guy ? considering he's an outlaw ?

he might be handsome to you.. but theres more to love than just physical look.. most people looks at personality first.

He should be at some youth correction facility.. if not, its like having a wild dog randomly roaming around your town.. waiting to randomly bite random people


Yeah, but hes had a hard life....hes a foster child and he gets moved from house to house...and i dont love him for the way he looks...thats deffinatly not it...he makes me happy with who i am...he makes me laugh...hes sweet...and its just the kindess in his voice....he holds my hand....lets me cry on his shoulders...gives me hugs...his kisses are so sweet and not forceful or controlling...


So, being a foster child excuses the fact that he sleeps around, drinks, parties, drugs or whatever?


Maybe he uses it as an escape...i dont know why he does the things he does...but i dont care about that...if he doesnt pressure me into anything like that then why would i care that he does that stuff if i truly love him?

Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 15:56:33
Jojoboo
Maybe because you care about HIM? His lifestyle isn't exactly healthy..
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 15:59:34
Beautiful-Lies
yeah i know its not healthy...i will talk to him about all that stuff...but when i feel the time is right....but for the sleeping aroudn part hes realized thats wrong...he wasnt suppose to be funny but yesterday when i was talkin to him he said"i need to go to sex rehab"....he actually wants to change...you know...i believe i can help him.
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 16:07:24
Jojoboo
Hmm.

Good luck, anyway, and if it fails, know that we are here to pick up and glue together the shatter that's left. ^^
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 16:10:52
Beautiful-Lies
thanks alot...ur really nice
Författare
Skrivet den 2006-06-25 16:13:20
Jojoboo
Aw, thankies. ^^ It warms.
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